DD isn't necessarily bad

For those responsible amongst you who do not have a non-drinker in their midst the perennial question before going out of an evening is, or should be, who is the designated driver. Only yesterday the NSW government released the 'Plan B' anti-drink driving advertisements which are focused entirely on ensuring people engaging in drinking do then not get engaged in wrapping their car around a pole.

It was my turn to DD recently and thought it would be a fairly early night so wasn't too bothered. Opting to go to a fairly popular cocktail bar at around 10 and then home by before midnight. At least, that's what I presumed.

By closing time, around 1am, we were invited out further by colleagues of a friend I was with. Thus began the saga of me entering a club, Mooseheads, entirely sober.

It was a mess.

That being said, it's an experience I'd recommend people try out, if only for the sheer morbid curiosity.

Being sober isn't really what clubs were invented for. They were created for the purpose of getting people drunk, then presumably laid (depending on the prowess of either party and the level of inebriation). To the person under the influence clubs are wild, exciting, dance-inducing blurs of intensity. Unfortunately for me, on that night, it was a sticky floored, sub thumping, dazzle-eyed, kind of stinky area of massive over-stimulation.

I'm not talking about first years getting over stimulated either; that was me. There was so much going on I could hardly keep a track of it. From the guy who took his shirt off and bared his enormous belly to the world, to the guy who used his bottle as a phallic object spraying beer on people, to the guy who walked up to the girls next to where I was sitting to chat them up. I could hardly take it all in; and I loved it.

I have a greater respect than ever now for the door staff. Where there are nine incidences of guys play fighting there is one actual squaring up. Maybe they can smell it, but I was impressed at the speed and accuracy with which they were able to differentiate.

The point of my story is to try it out, deprive the clubs your payment for just one night and experience what it's like to club sober.